In a dark room lit only by the glow of a monitor, David clutched at his chest. A fist of ice was squeezing the life from him.
Most people feared dying alone. David welcomed it. For him, this was a perfectly acceptable end. He was satisfied.
His world was the internet, his sustenance came in greasy cardboard boxes, and his entertainment streamed in high definition. It was a good life, a full life. But after thirty-five years of zero exercise and a diet of pure convenience, his body disagreed.
His vision folded into blackness, a curtain dropping on the final act.
But the show wasn't over. Consciousness remained—a single, stubborn spark in an infinite void. He couldn't move, couldn't feel, couldn't see, but he could still think.
Is this the afterlife?
He’d never been religious, but it seemed they’d been right about something, at least.
An ethereal voice echoed through the darkness, a thought that blossomed directly in his mind.
"Who are you? Where am I?"
"First, I must apologize. There was an error on my part. You departed from your world far too soon. You were not supposed to die."
It didn't take a genius to figure it out. He was speaking to a god.
"You're a god, right?"
"Yes. I am. …Aren't you angry?" The being sounded genuinely curious, its composure thrown by David's indifference.
"I assume you can't bring me back," David reasoned. "If you could, you would have just fixed your mistake and revived me instead of wasting time with a conversation."
He'd never seen the point in worrying about things he couldn't change.
What would yelling at a god accomplish? It wasn't going to restart his heart.
"You're not even going to ask why an Almighty Administrator like me can't revive people? That's it? You're okay with this?"
If he still had a body, David would have shrugged.
"I'm a chill guy," he replied.
He thought he heard the god let out an exhausted sigh, but it must have been his imagination.
"I was prepared for the mysterious, peaceful deity routine while you screamed at me… whatever. Since this is my error, I am obligated to give you something in return."
"Just take my soul, man. If I don't have a consciousness, I won't know that I'm missing out on the next anime releasing this season."
"Ahem… since I cannot return you to your original world, I will grant you a new life in another one."
If the god had a body, he would have been leaning in, expecting to see David's non-existent face light up with excitement.
But David's response was nonexistent.
The god, being omniscient, knew all about David's love for anime. It had assumed the prospect of being transported to another world would be a dream come true.
"Why aren't you excited?! Otaku like you love isekai, right?"
Of course, David was familiar with the concept. He was a fan of the genre, along with all other forms of fantasy entertainment.
But watching it was one thing. Living it was another proposition entirely.
He loved watching heroes fight demon lords from the comfort of his chair. He had absolutely no desire to be the one doing the fighting.
That was the beauty of his previous life. He never had to fight for survival; everything he needed was a click away.
If he was hungry, food appeared at his doorstep. If he was bored, he could load up a game. Bored of that? He could stream a movie.
In another world, he would have none of that.
He would rather just disappear than be forced to start over from scratch.
"Just take my soul, man," David said, already bored and fighting the phantom impulse to pull out a phone and scroll for an hour.
His attitude was so palpable it rendered the god speechless.
An angry nonbeliever would have been easier to handle than this.
"Sorry, not possible. I have to place your soul into a new body in a new world. That's the rule. And no matter how much you complain—"
"Well, if you have no choice, then so be it."
"That easily?! Hey! Don't shrug your nonexistent shoulders!"
After only a few minutes with David, the god was already worn out. It immediately cast a spell, sending David's soul hurtling down into another world.
A strange warmth enveloped his entire being, the sensation of being submerged in a thick, viscous fluid.
Immersed in this 'water,' David heard the fading, annoyed voice of the god.
"P.S. I gave you abilities based on your desires. It's unknown for now, but you'll find out about it soon enough."
"And since I took you away from your very comfortable life, I've decided to reincarnate you as the youngest son of the richest family in the entire world. So, live a life of luxury, Mr. Indifferent."
"$)(@#)(%$)&$#)&@"
Ethan heard a cacophony of muffled sounds and excited noises he couldn't comprehend.
He felt his head being pulled from somewhere warm and slimy.
Then, a blinding light.
It took him a few seconds for his eyes to adjust.
Where am I? What are they saying?
[They seem to be congratulating you on your birth.]
[I am HelperBot-9000, your personal AI assistant.]